Things You Can Do To Help Blog
More information about the Things You Can Do To To Help Blog is available on its Landing Page.
Additional Blogs and Online Seminars available from BI include:
Constructive Conflict MOOS Seminar | Conflict Frontiers MOOS Seminar | MOOS Fundamentals | BI in Context | Colleague Activities
Posts ordered from most recent to earliest.
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Infographic: See the Conflict's Complexity
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Infographic: The Quest for Total Victory is a Recipe for Continuing Strife
Coexistence offers a better path for everyone.
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Infographic: Give People a Chance to Surprise You
A simple idea to improve relationships.
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Infographic: Respect: "A Silver Bullet?
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Don't Take the "Hate Bait"
Hate begets hate, fear, anger, and eventually violence. Don't fall into the trap! And if you are in, climb out!
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Practice (and Preach) Civility in Public and Private Discourse
Incivility begets more of the same, while civil discourse can help de-escalate conflict and improve relationships.
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Seek Co-existence, Not Total Victory
The demand for total victory is a recipe for continuing and deepening strife--co-existence is essential for peace.
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Infographic: Conflict Isn't a Spectator Sport
Political conflict isn't a spectator sport--in a democracy we all have the responsibility to get involved in a constructive way.
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Treat EVERYONE With Respect
Respect is free to give, yet its payback is huge: breaking down stereotypes and often earning respect in return.
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Confront Constructively
An essay exploring what a more constructive (and more effective) strategy for confronting injustice might look like.
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Pick Your Fights--Let Things Go When You Can
Fights cost lots and may be lost! If you can live and let live, it is often much better for all.
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Try Collaboration First!
If we dig below positions, we often can collaborate with "our enemies" to the benefit of all.
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Listen To and Talk With (not to) the Other Side
Even if you think you know what the other side thinks, you likely don't--and they don't know you either.
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Find Others to Work With
Alone we can do a little bit, but with others we can accomplish much more. Collaboration works!
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Play a "Third Side Role"
"Third siders" are disputants and outsiders - united in a desire to transform conflicts for the better.
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Minimize the Use of Force
Exchange and respect are more powerful than force--they persuade without causing backlash.
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Understand Your--and Others'--Fundamental Human Needs
Fundamental needs are common drivers of conflict. But they don't have to be.
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Persuade People By Meeting Their Interests Too
If you can let the other side win something too, the chances of cooperation go way up.
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Break Down Negative Stereotypes
Don’t assume a person you don’t know is just like you expect them to be. Give them a chance to surprise you!
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Be Willing to Consider the Possibility That You May Be Wrong
Most of us are so enmeshed in our own worldviews that we don't consider that we might be wrong. It helps to listen to outsiders and consider that possibility.
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Listen Actively and Empathically
Empathic listening is amazingly powerful--sometimes that is all that is needed to defuse destructive conflicts.
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Allow Your Opponents to "Save Face."
No one likes to be humiliated--allowing your opponent to save face will help defuse a conflict.
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Focus on Fixing the Problem, Not Attacking People
Attacking people makes them angry. Enlisting their help to solve a mutual problem is more likely to work as hoped.
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Sound the Alarm
People don't realize how destructive their conflict behaviors often are: we must sound the alarm to spur change!
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First, Do No Harm
Doctors promise to, at a minimum, “do no harm.” People who want to improve conflicts should do the same.
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If You're Not Part of the Solution, You're Part of the Problem
Conflict is created by everyone--it becomes better or worse depending on what all of us do.
